Anonymous Confessions From Cannabis Moms in Quarantine
By Christina PérezPsst: Moms have probably been using cannabis in some form or another for centuries. Evidence suggests that the plant’s magical healing properties have been celebrated since as far back as 500 B.C., and—much more recently—a Miss Grass-conducted survey of moms found that 38% said they even preferred the green stuff to alcohol at least some of the time. Not just because it’s relaxing and fun, but also because it can potentially help ease pain and stress. As one mom put it: “Microdosing with cannabis helped me through my postpartum anxiety when prescription drugs had made it worse. Plus, ‘mom juice’ (wine) is so 2017. This is the age of the edibles, ladies. Your liver will thank you and your kids will love the dance parties.”
So, it should also come as no surprise that in this strange new world of self-isolation, stay-at-home orders, and Coronavirus-induced uncertainty, cannabis is coming to the rescue for moms (and the rest of us) like never before. Most states where cannabis is medicinally and recreationally legal have deemed dispensaries “essential businesses” and March 2020 saw record sales for the industry as consumers rushed to stock up.
But moms who consume still face a certain amount of stigma (68% of cannabis-consuming moms say they’ve faced discrimination for their preference—unfair!) and, with the pressure of balancing the already intense experience of parenthood with the new strain of working from home, schooling from home, and just plain being stuck at home all the damn time, we wanted to know exactly how moms are currently using cannabis and if their perspective on the plant has changed as of late. Turns out, it definitely has: One mom we asked sums it up this way: “The answer is just, more. I’m definitely consuming more than ever before.”
Here, moms anonymously share their thoughts on everything from their current cannabis consumption to how they’re coping with quarantine motherhood to their best advice for other moms.*
*Quotes have been edited for clarity and length.
On the challenging, weirdest, and best things about being a mom these days:
“I love the opportunity I've been given to teach my kids more about what they're interested in while spending more time with them—they're learning all about plant medicine as we grow cannabis indoors for the first time this year; they're learning more about music and dancing and we're all trying to enjoy each other. I'm trying to be less strict with them. On the other hand, they're also driving me insane! The fighting and screaming and infinite energy. I've never heard so many brilliant, made-up songs about penises, vulvas, butts, booboos, farts and poo, but enough is enough. Thank god for cannabis.”
“Ensuring my daughter is learning has been challenging—although she's only three years old I still worry that I'm not teaching her enough. I am very grateful that we are not struggling financially and am relieved that I don't have to stress about finding a job right away. It's allowing me to be fully present with her—I don't get caught up in the news cycle. It's more important for me to paint flowers with her, play in our backyard, or learn new songs. I'm surprised at how much she's loving being home with me—and I'm loving it, too.”
“Just keeping my cool, to be honest. I always want to just blow up but realize their schedules and routines have drastically changed and we’re all experiencing feelings we can’t control.”
“I have mom guilt—making sure the kids don’t forget everything they learned when they were still in school; worrying about providing. But I have enjoyed being with them so much. I have seen them in so many different new lights and they are so fascinating to me.”
“I'm lucky that my kids are young and we don't have to worry about school right now. For the most part they are fairly well-behaved; I have two boys that are two and four. They think it's great being home and that puts my mind at ease knowing they feel safe and comfortable. But it does get hard not having a break from it.”
On the worries keeping them up at night:
“What will the world look and feel like once this pandemic ends? How will it end? When will it end? What will getting on a subway be like? Will I tell my daughter not to hug the people she loves when she sees them for the first time in-person?”
“Work. I'm a cashier, not a Frontline worker or hero by any means, but the exposure worries me.”
“Not knowing when we’ll be able to move forward. Wondering whether or not the world will have learned from and leaned into this opportunity for healing ourselves and the earth.”
“The lack of social time for my daughter and the world’s weakening immune systems as a result of prolonged social distancing.”
On the recent deep thoughts they’re having these days while high:
“Perspective is everything. These moments are rare and, while stressful, are going to be life-changing.”
“It's time to tap into my creative talents more heavily and aggressively and try to find ways to help.”
“What makes someone wise and how can someone come to be a wise person? I concluded that the only way to be wise is through having experienced things, places, and people.”
“I keep thinking about how this virus is truly a revolution being forced upon us. But a revolution that can truly result in a much better, more empathetic, more caring, and a more fair world. This is our do-over in a way and I wish, hope, and pray that we get it right.”
“I’m hoping that the chaos I'm feeling inside of myself isn't being projected onto my kids. I pray that years from now they remember this as a happy and peaceful time at home.”
“Am I truly happy? Have I been doing everything I want to live out my life? Nope. Reality check.”
“My late husband’s birthday was this month. I’m missing him and mad that I’m doing this all alone.”
“I’m wondering if this is the perfect time to be pregnant or the worst.”
On how their cannabis ritual has changed in quarantine:
“Pre-quarantine, I'd roll a J every night after I put my daughter to sleep and take my window of mama time to write, read, or binge TV. It was a nightly ritual I cherished, like a date night with my J. When quarantine started, my nightly ritual changed. As a single co-parent figuring out WFH and school from home, I’d find myself wanting to hit my J during the day. Some days, I'd sneak out during nap time, and at night, I'm so tired that I go to bed early. And, now, even that has changed: I've been laid off for about two weeks and my daughter no longer takes daytime naps. I've found more ease with her without the stress of work, but my patience still gets tested teaching ABCs, so I have been enjoying a tincture at lunch which lasts through the afternoon. I still can't decide if this is my new thing since I'm old-school and love a good J.”
“I don’t normally use CBD—or weed in any way—but I recently tried edibles; I needed the stress relief and deep belly laughs.”
“I'm definitely consuming more than ever: More CBD oil (morning and night), more flower smoked, more vaping (a few times a day and more after the kids are asleep) and more edibles. I find that edibles help me get one of those amazing nights of sleep that seem so rare after becoming a mum.”
“Smoking before cooking has given me the patience to actually cook good meals.”
On the parenting rules they’ve thrown out the window:
“Screen time limitations. As long as the screen time is balanced with physical activity and outdoor time it doesn’t seem like such a big deal to me.”
“Schedule. Everything is entirely too hectic right now.”
“Saying ‘no’ automatically. Sometimes saying yes is okay—especially now.”
“I don’t even know rules at this point.”
On the advice they’d give other moms right now:
“Soak it up. But take time for you. Being a new, first time mom, I was scared to go back to work. Now I get to WFH and spend extra time with my baby. Regardless of your situation, spending time with your family like this is such an amazing experience. But you won’t be able to enjoy it unless you take care of yourself too.”
“Do your best. Do all the things or none of the things. Take time every single day, even if it's just a minute in the bathroom for yourself. Try not to beat yourself up over things not getting done—they will eventually or they won't. Keep finding patience for yourself, for your kid(s) and for the world we currently live in.”
“You are enough. You did a good job as long as you tried. We are all equal. We cannot judge motherhood. If you’re good to yourself, your children will be happy, too.”
“You are part of the family you work so hard to take care of—you have to check yourself, too, cause it’s true: when mama’s not happy, no one is happy.”
“If you are taking higher doses than normal don't feel bad about it!”
“Don’t stress about anything too much! A couple years from now no ones gonna remember!”
“Take things one day at a time, smoke the weed, drink the drinks, get some alone time, do whatever you need to do to decompress. It's so important.”
“Hold tight, mamas! The best is yet to come, always.”